Yes. http://shine.yahoo.com mostly comes up with this kind of topics. They have stories like ‘7 Dog Breeds that Should Never Be Mixed’ ‘4 Secrets to a Better Meatloaf’ ‘Most Popular Kitten Names of 2013’ ‘5 Fattiest Restaurant Dishes in America’ and even ones like, ‘The 10 Most Annoying Moms – How Many of Them Have You Encountered?’ So Miss Dee gets inspiration and comes up with her own, ‘4 most embarrassing moments in her life.’ Maybe if she is lucky, yahoo will like it and adopt it for their page. By the way, who wants to know the most embarrassing moments in someone like Miss Dee’s life? Maybe if she were to be Beyonce or Paris Hilton or Macauley Culkin or Tyra Banks or a famous person in the show business, yahoo will gladly reproduce the story on their page. But well, Miss Dee is an upcoming star, soon , yes, very soon, she will appear on that page, and the story will read ‘Miss Dee’s top 5 hangouts’ or ‘15 things Miss Dee hates in her life’ or something close to that. But until Miss Dee becomes a famous person in the industry, whether in show business or in politics or whichever field, she has to make do with this blog. But come to think of it, there never seem to be similar stories about lecturers or engineers or is it that nobody wants to find out what happens in the life of a Dr. so and so or an engineer? Why are such stories mostly about people in the show business? That is food for thought.
Yes. So Miss Dee writes her 4 most embarrassing moments in the 20 something years of her life on earth. She starts with the bottom 4
Moment# 4 –Have you ever done radio, and during the news, you are asked to report on a particular incident, which you yourself were present and trying to recall the incident, your head suddenly went blank? Well, Miss Dee has been through that experience before and it’s something she doesn’t want to remember. The newscaster said, “So Dee, you were present at the incident. What happened?” Suddenly all the big English vanished from Miss Dee’s head. She sat in the studio staring at the newscaster’s face and for about 50 seconds or so, there was dead silence. As she tried to say something, all that came out of her mouth and into the microphone was air. She tried one last time and the words, “Please can you allow me gather my thoughts?” came out of her mouth. The newscaster, who doubled as the editor, just looked at Miss Dee’s face, shook his head and told listeners he had to go on commercial break. You do not want to know what happened in the studio during the 3 minutes break.
Moment#3 – Miss Dee has a white blouse. She wore it to town one afternoon. The blouse was cotton and revealed her cleavage. Well, just a little bit. As Miss Dee was strutting through town that afternoon, a man called her aside and asked, “So why do you ladies decide to put on these things at all? Can’t you see you are exposing your breast?” He licked his lips and added, “Anyway, it’s not that bad looking. If you would want to have some ‘fun’ tonight, just take my phone number, give me a flash and I will be at your service.” “Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?” Miss Dee felt something down her throat. She wasn’t too sure whether she was close to tears or she just wanted to throw up. How could he? The thought of that incident always arouses mixed feelings within Miss Dee. She is not too sure what those feelings are; whether it’s pity for herself, disgust for the man or what?
Moment#2 – Most people hate authority, no matter the form it comes in or the level. But it is worse and most annoying when your mates or the people you came to school with, all of a sudden have so much power and the title, ‘prefect’ added to their names. Whenever that happens, even your best friend begins to abhor everything about you (that experience will make a whole blog). So Miss Dee was once Prefect Dee. Prefect Dee gets a haircut. In her school, the rule was to cut the hair low, without exposing the scalp. But the barber decided to do something which he thought would fit Prefect Dee better. He decides to cut, no, shave Prefect Dee’s hair, without leaving a trace of hair on her head. Yes. Prefect Dee’s hair became as shiny and smooth as a mirror. Apart from the fact that Prefect Dee’s head felt cold in the evenings when the weather became cool, she had also broken a school rule. And with the title of prefect added to her name, she was already a ‘wanted’ person by her mates and her juniors. Prefect Dee became the subject of scorn and gossip during that period of her secondary school days. What magic can you even do to make your hair grow faster? That was the mystery Miss Dee was trying to solve in her head during that period. What made the situation even injurious was when a chemistry teacher commented on the haircut in class. “What kind of haircut is this?” he said, “Are you even a boy or a girl? If it were to be in my days, you would have gotten some lashes and sent home to serve a 2 week suspension for this haircut you have. See your head.” You cannot imagine how the class burst into laughter when the teacher said that. Miss Dee or Prefect Dee’s name changed for about 2 weeks to ‘Are you a boy or a girl?’
The Grand embarrassment. Moment#1 – This particular incident gets to be #1 because it happened recently and it had a more live audience. We all know how titles are very important in the African setting. Your head may even be chopped off if somebody has a doctorate and you decide to call him Mister so and so. How dare you? Where were you when this man was struggling in the graduate school writing his thesis and going through all the stress and hardships to get that title? You, the one even calling him Mister, do you even have a first degree? Not to even mention a masters degree and you decide to call someone with a doctorate, Mister. Well, Miss Dee found herself in a similar situation when she called one renowned professor in one of the difficult fields, Mrs. This happened not at the studio for the host to go on a commercial break to wipe out the disgrace. This was during a programme in a large conference room with the guests seated. As Miss Dee introduced the lady as Mrs. So and so she heard murmurs among the audience and looks of their faces which seemed to say, “So you, which part of the planet do you come from,dummy? Do you mean to tell us you do not know this famous professor? Don’t be making such silly mistakes again…….” And as the renowned professor walked onto the stage, in fact as soon as she got up from her seat and started walking towards the microphone, she started saying in a rather shrill voice, “I am not Mrs, I am not Mrs, I am not Mrs……….” She kept repeating that till she got to the microphone and spoke into it. “I am not Mrs. I am Professor…………” Wow! that was an important lesson to note; Don’t mess around with people’s titles and their positions. Miss Dee, bear that in mind.